Modernization Hub

Modernization and Improvement


Lisa A Romano idea on a mistake about the love and
light and you it’s been awhile since I’ve put out a YouTube video for my
channel and that’s because I’ve been working pretty much non-stop to finish
up my coaching program which should launch within the next few weeks I will
be having a webinar at the end of March and I’ll be free and I really hope you
join me and I’m gonna be talking about what’s involved with coaching program
but I like it right to what this video is all about it is about attachment
trombone and how it relates to being codependent and in some cases being
involved with the narcissism how a kind of like all together so little bit about
attachment trauma too late I see it and the way I made it makes sense in my head
is that you know 11 a child is born here and share it with everyone across this
little beautiful baby divine right this baby is supported is common in choir
meets in utero with it with an umbilical cord attached to that corn is
responsible for all the offense the newborns fetuses nutrients it is it’s
for lack of a better way of explaining an extension cord to mother where the
child is actually in some other connected there’s a flow there there’s
an energetic flow right from from mother to baby baby to mother back and forth
its beautiful wanted to find an amazing design I mean really so why not baby
gets will learn and build gets cut that’s very serious and that alone is
traumatic because now this child is no longer relying on this score that’s in
this extension cord to make it feel grounded so what is supposed to happen after a child
is born is a child is supposed to end up on those moments right after a child is
born very very important in my case my son
was born with the cord wrapped around his neck I had toxemia I mean I held him
for if I held her for a man it was a long time and they took him away from me
and I couldn’t see him until the next day because I had toxemia preeclampsia
and they were so worried about me at the time with my blood pressure and it
seemed to the next day which is terrible so we’re talking about attachment
attachments what we’re talkin attachment trauma we have to first really
appreciate the fact that you got me that every every single person that you see
on the street every person that’s ever been any personal ever be made to feel
connected or grounded today if you do the studies if you if you if
you research you will discover that I found this fascinating that a mother’s
body has the ability to regulate your newborn’s body temperature they’ve done
studies studies with twins where that’s a blessed day the breast actually like this the breast is so funny but I’m
depressed actually one brass will will actually heat up if Bill wants win needs
their body temperature due to raise and the other the other breast Lashley cool
if if the other end up the other twin means the body temperature to be cool down see what I’m trying to say
is that if there’s if a newborn infant twins born and their body temperature is
too high the mother’s breast if you take the opposite wins body temperature is
too low the mother’s breasts will actually she got fabulous regulation
going on outside the field of consciousness divine connection so gonna
talk about instincts and primal needs and basic primal trauma codes it’s sort
of like when you open up computer program are you get a video game it
comes coded right or a pass codes we as human beings have certain posts haha
coating is to experience is grounding experience in utero and to have that
grounding experience continued after were born now when there’s an attacker
trauma when there is a problem with mother perhaps she offered it dies right
after were born or aren’t there is some type of a break in that next time it
happens my son and I are if after this child is born this mother is unable to
connect to this child we’re talking about a tax return let’s talk about
adult children who come from abusive homes have been ignored by omission who
have been abused by omission who have been abused by coalition who have been
sexually abused mothers are alcoholics who cannot connect to their children
whose mothers are crack addicts whose mothers are schizophrenic whose mothers
are severely co-dependent marriage or now all it is completely blog avail of
consciousness you know completely stressed out trying to micromanage need
to the alcoholic so many boxes of alcoholics are living in fear fight or flight response which mimics
childhoods what they don’t realize is that as a Chinaman micromanage the fear
of the home by trying to keep calm we’ve got children who are being ignored and
not being able to connect to the mother that’s just a sad reality that doesn’t
make the mom of baby killer that doesn’t make her an axe murderer that makes her
unaware that makes her out of the realm of conscience that makes her basically what she’s
doing she’s replant childhood and she’s not aware at what’s happening so we have
these instincts these days do these new code and jocks and being connected to
our mothers absolutely one of them so when we won we are unable to create
those bonds with their mothers what ends up happening is we suffer an attachment
pharmacy think about codependency accorded pattern is fueled by this
innate push this innate need to bond to bond to bond to attach co-dependency
cash they believe they think they need this just being outside at them in most
cases the person that we as co-defendants were gonna do it Sharma will attract someone who is
either just like our mother or just like our father or a combination of both in
most cases it’s a combination of both and would become the Eagles I and you
look at it from our perspective you can see like you know she’s like my mother
and she’s like my father or you know he’s like my mother and he’s like my
father and we know this because we feel
childlike when we’re trying to relate to these people so any outsider ability to
control it so the further below the veil of consciousness you are you are the
harder it is for the last time you take looking at the attacker trauma the heart
of the harder it is to actually appropriately appropriately deal with
the attachment trauma and that facet of how codependency showing up in your life
so the really interesting is that attachment trauma make someone in the
real-time feel afraid not attachment so it’s it gets really really complicated in the mind and that’s what
really helps to talk it out with someone whose professional action understand the
task dependency and was actually I’m successfully navigated out of it talking to someone actually gone through
just because they understand like the nooks and crannies and and that the
hidden always that a lot of people who haven’t been to this don’t understand
and so what we doing about dealing with attachment trauma the whole fear is the
brain thanks it needs this connection so now getting into another default setting
another cold pain vs pleasure so we have one need one in eight need that is now
acting upon another coast so we have one attachment trauma called the tacking on another code one
in a program in a program we’re not talking about the subconscious
programming that’s the world so you know I think about that those outside
influences like think about Christ carrying the cross as we all set for
many of us like this is the Cross will have to bear so the subconscious
programming other childhood brainwashing is not talking about talking about your
code what you need it as a human being and let’s talk about why you know if you
think about why if your Creator why would you why
would you go to you and being with this need to feel seen why would you go to
human being with this need to attach well if I’m creator I want to cure my
species you know I want to make sure that this human race has a really good
chance procreating and you know I’m being able to enjoy the wonders of this
beautiful quiet that I created think about what would happen if created to
not cold within us this need to attach mothers would give birth and they would
talk to the kids off a cliff they would let them go hungry they wouldn’t pick
them up and actually breastfeeding I mean our bodies our mother’s body is
absolutely designed to take care of this this human being and so it’s an almost
got you the same way hello you know so all of us came here with the same media
and this damn cold that’s just that’s what makes us all brothers and sisters
you know we all have the same needs so we have the one caught you attach and
then we have now it’s supposed to protect us as we move forward is the
pain vs pleasure principle so why would creator she’d actually this is pain vs
pleasure in small my opinion it was supposed to be a divine guidance system
that’s it so when I stepped out of my family and with all my stuff out quite a
bit I step on a shopper shock rock I talked about this new programming one of
the modules and the pain that I associate with stepping on iraq will
actually help will carling with the pleasure of that never happen again so
you know I could be an afterthought have a very small Solo very small brain or
whatever and not be very positive or not be very sophisticated and I can
understand this pain is pleasure principle and codependency and trauma dobbs decor and design so we have now
now think about many many many many many generations later never become the eye
in the sky you know don’t just see it as a Neanderthal and forget this whole this
whole time line of human existence and this whole evolution and all these
outside crosses release outside influences whether it be war or small
pox or you know alcoholism or whatever you know the trials and tribulations of
trying to get from one part of the world to another and you know that the
survival of that so if you trace back civilizations to 2016 and you now at
Intuit ok you have alcoholism you have you know also if I was a kid it was
claimed losses in and that was the name of the drug LSD you know I’m dating
myself you know today I don’t even know what the hell is out there today you know I never did drugs honest with
you I was just too damn afraid of what might happen you know I was a first
responder when I was a kid and I watched it grow over to my age and I had to pick
her up off the ground and that was enough for me that was not nice enough
and so if you think about human species and Watchmen introduced now think about
the different types of crosses that we’ve had to bear maybe our mothers had
$2 have to bear the cross of racism masturbation and the separation that
came from that in in a community or even a house you know and now we’re now or
back in the nineteen twenties when there was a separation between the idea that
women were not you know as valuable as man and didn’t have the right to just
keep going back and you could see that each generation karadzic process so here
we are that’s a 2016 advanced creatures we
think we are and now my life really isn’t that much about trying to survive
you know we pretty much have found ways to create homes we have jobs now on now with the type of human beings
that lot more we want our spirituality we want to get more out of life now I
need an hour associating clashes with freedom emotional with choices because
thank god you know in our history and human evolution that we can think about
you know encouraging ourselves seriously beautiful so now running associate pain
with not feeling free now while we’re talking about attachment
trauma 2016 for those of us who are the adults are dysfunctional people who did
not but were not able to bond with us the issue at hand is we have long called
for a meeting to bomb the second code is pain vs pleasure we have to go back to
the first code I need to bond because our brands are going to associate pain
not and never receiving the attachment and pleasure with achieving the attachment fast-forward to
be an adult and out of a father’s home an hour where sexual beings and we bump
into somebody who we feel extremely attracted to it is like the little black
box in the bottom of the ocean going being that’s low that’s cool but what it
is is that their vibration that person’s vibration if you’re not heal is
resonating with the aspect of you that’s stored in you being operational level
Michael branding iron yourselves have been branded with the vibrations that
your brand associate with love to this human being not a personal showing up is
probably going to be a lot like mom or dad remember to bring associates mom and
dad with your need to attach so now there’s going to be a pleasure being
motivated like the internal drive to watch what chapter you might not even
like this person knowledgeable you could hear what has he think he is you know I’m caught in cognitively you
can’t think like what the hell does she think she is you know you could hear
your brain to 5% of you not like this person but you won’t understand the 95%
just dry within each want to attach this person that’s why so often when I caught
your client will tell me I did you like my husband the first day I met him I
knew he wasn’t the right person for me but I don’t know I felt drawn to him
because we’re 95% unconscious and 95% of what we do you can feel and as a result
of watching the subconscious mind and the result is primal needs versus
posture and in the need to attach that have gone row now we have the ability enlightened beings of 2016 and
lightworkers so many of you are and I know you are we have the ability to
unite our final and turn it on like a flashlight and look below attachment trauma look inside the subconscious mind we
have the right to pull these ideas apart and look at them and I seconds I feel
that way and wifeys expanded viewpoints and
understandings you begin to learn how to master two programs so the thing with the thing
that gets sticky with attachment trauma is that so let’s say you’re you’re
married to an alcoholic or drug addict or a sex addict or whatever you just use
your marriage or problematic person right and you want to leave them five percent of you
says I gotta get outta here but there’s this 95% this as I can’t do it so the
95% of you I’m sure you wake up and you see what’s happening below the surface
is attachment it’s a consequence of attachment drama what’s happening in you
you internally see attachment to this person because the plan pain vs
principle is driving you to attach and it seemed time you’re also associating
pain will be leaving the person so your story it’s like a pump so so many of my
clients and so many of you right now I want to go but I’m afraid to go like I
keep telling myself I want to go with five percent but 95% of you is is one
wants to also bombed this person and also at same time is associating fear
with leaving this person so it’s like this cat-and-mouse game so for me my
life changed when I saw it when I understood what was happening and I learned to bond with myself and i
learn to I started getting pissed off that I have like this crap going on
inside I was unable to control over my strength I was determined to get like
kick ass like no no default setting is going to control me anymore I want to
think with my conscious deliberate mine I wanted to become a creator of my own
reality I want the life I want I don’t want the life to default that’s going to
default setting type life I don’t want to live my default settings the hell no
I will decide what I think I will decide what I feel I will decide who I want to
spend my time with and live within a few are not being white too I will decide
and so that’s what I’m hoping that you will gain from my upcoming coaching
program and that’s what I hope that you will be released but he also threw for
any of you that is a new my work and that’s what I hope that you gain prom
prom my my website and my books and all the information that I put out my
internet my meditations I hope you feel liberated and three and I hope you learn
how to master your mind and how to understand the default settings and how
to over right now 01 this is you know I like it could be
anything that you want about it alone in the light and you not I


  1. just found your channel… and i want to thank you!
    Trying to recover from a lifetime of abuse, so i really needed to hear you.
    namaste ______/______

  2. aweek ago I listened to a 30 min meditation on attachment trauma . It was so powerfuk and freeing to me . My eyesight was better. But now I cannot find it.There was a picture of little dark haired young girl during the med. I have awful time with relationships. Got myself out of passive aggressive and alcoholic/drug relationships, friends betrayed me, gone. now very lonely. I work hard acupuncture and permaculture landscaping. I need help there too but go at everything alone.

  3. can this attachment trauma also accure if you were close to perhaps a father who suddenly died in a strange way ? feeling so attached to the person that passed away that you just can't let him go and are to scared to confront the reality ?
    I lost my dad seven y ago , yet I don't WANT him to be gone , I constantly say " no I can't just accept that , we were close , he was my dad but also my best friend and there is NO ONE that even looks like him , I don't want to accept that , because I can't , I feel to attached " , is that the same ? Or did I get this all wrong ? thx for your video ! x

  4. The label of attachment trauma as the primary condition generating codependency explains so much in my life. With men, pain always equaled love. I thought it was my lot in life! Growing emotionally & spiritually now. Your videos have been a big part of growth. So grateful for your service. Namaste❤

  5. Just found your channel. Dated a Borderline for 5 months and it was a total nightmare. I broke up with her but still have feelings for her even though she was very emotionally abusive. She was exactly like my alcoholic father who raised me. I didn't like him much and I didn't like my ex either but was drawn to her. The 5%, 95% theory is so true. And your quote: "No default setting is going to control me anymore" is very inspirational. I will be subscribing and following your guidance. Thank you!

  6. it's all starting to make sense. we are literally using that small 5% of our brain to battle against the 95% that is running the show; it's one thing to hear it described but to actually embrace it is the necessity if we want to create our own lives.
    Thanks for sharing your wisdom…I'm a newby on this journey

  7. omg omg omg i married my mother. passive agressive mother and im a codependant. freaking out a bit but i already knewthis deep down.. i am so glad i found you lisa!!! NAMASTE! wow, just WOW. bless you darling! xx

  8. YES, YES, YES!!!!!! THANK YOU for making this understandable! I have read WAKING THE TIGER, I am really into Dan Seigal, I've been in ACA for 24 years! I've been to The Meadows for workshops, and I try to explain these things to people I, "mentor," in program.
    NO ONE HAS EVER EVER EXPLAIN IT THIS WELL!!!!! WOW!!!!! This is what she be taught in schools as a priority!!!
    My mother was being beaten when I was born and there was alcoholism involved. Knowing this is life saving. YES YES YES!!!!!!

  9. Thank you for making me aware to patterns I was completely unaware of and that hv brought me so much fear, sadness and feeling of helplessnes. You are doing a holy work. Thank you so much. 😘

  10. This video resonates with me. I'm a fraternal twin. We were born at 27 weeks. Our mother had eclampsia. I was 1lb 12oz & my sister was 2lbs 11oz. Our mother was told that she should give us up for adoption because we would either be plagued by health problems or we would both be mentally handicapped. My sister was in the hospital for the 1st month of her life & was able to go home. I was in the hospital in the NICU for the first 6+ months of my life. I knew the nurses apparently better than I knew the mother that couldn't be bothered to visit (or so my family says). But she kept us. My sister & I are incredibly intelligent, & nothing the doctors said about us proved to be right. But we both suffer the effects of codependency, made worse by our mom using us as her flying monkeys & scapegoats whenever the need arose. & we're both still trying to heal.

  11. & OMG, later in this video… "I didn't even like my husband when I met him!" Ding, Ding, Ding!!! I despised my husband when I met him. Despised. I felt he was overly gregarious, loud, & thought he was the s***. But, I was drawn to him almost immediately. & we are total opposites. He's very hands-on, smart, but not book-smart. I'm the exact opposite. But we ended up married. & now I feel like everyday is the same cycle of codepency, passive-aggressiveness, & dragging myself down to get him to connect with me & be vulnerable. But that'll never happen.

  12. I am 50 and only now realising how I have been programmed to believe all men are useless, selfish, uncaring, cheaters etc…… and amazingly the men I have wanted to be with and connect with… guess what. I grew up with one alchoholic parent and the other a co-dependent enabler. There was indirect verbal abuse from the alcholic parent and I witnessed physical violence between my parents regularly. My Dad was arrested on several occasions. The cycle endlessly repeated itself. My first memory of the violence was at around the age of 7. My mother turned me into her confidante as soon as I was able to understand what she was saying. She broke all my boundaries and shared such intimate information with me that I decided to hate my Dad and did not speak to him for many years. She still does it now, although my Dad no longer drinks at all due to health concerns, but oddly I always thought my Dad was the abuser due to the drink, now I see how my Mum violated the sanctity of my childhood instead of reaching out to a counsellor, how she taught me to hate men, why I developed a horrible hormone disorder in puberty that I did not resolve until the age of 24 or so, because my body was screaming out the abuse I had received and was unable to deal with as a developing child. I have met and dated nice, kind men and found them uninteresting and my last few relationships have all been with substance abusing narcissists who were not present to my feelings or for me in any situation when I needed them and who had often showed behaviours of both parents. I am only now beginning the serious work on myself. Thank you from the heart Lisa!

  13. Thank you for your insight and huge heart to share of yourself to help others stuck in this wicked web of manipulation. Helping to find peace again through a way out of the situation back to loving themselves and being mentally/ physically healthy again.

  14. I would make videos shorter, and the voice is sometimes too loud…but what you say is priceless and that´s the most important thing…thank you.

  15. I stayed in a 24 year abusive loveless marriage. I finally got enough nerve to leave and haven't looked back.
    I can clearly see how I was repeating my parents marriage and how parallel my childhood and adult life was.
    Everything you mention in this video is 100% true and what I have lived until 12 years ago.
    The pieces of the puzzle haven fallen into place and make so much sense.
    My mom was unable to attach to me and vice versa which has made a very dysfunctional relationship. Sadly, I have had to break the ties a few weeks ago as she was taking me down to a place I would never recover from.
    It has been difficult to separate, but all so necessary for survival and healing.

  16. Your work here is so valuable to the world. Thank you for helping so many of us with our conditioning and increasing our awareness and being a light to many. I like your style, authneticity, sharing and the way you use your hands and expressive facial expressions to make points regarding concepts where visuals are immensely helpful. please continue your good works….

  17. I was texting my ex today. We texted back n forth. He finally told me the truth that he was in love with his gf. We were together for 8 years on and off. I kicked him out cuz he wasn't being a good example to my 13year old son. Drinking and smoking weed. He moved on after only 3 months. He's been with her for two years now. He finally tells me the truth that he loves her. I just had a meltdown and my heart broke all over again. I thought I was gonna die. He led me on for the past 2 years. I'm such a fool. I asked him if he was happy numerous times and he could never tell me. Cuz he was mind screwing me. I fell for it. I hate myself for this. I hate having BPD. It makes life so complicated and painful. I'm in therapy but I've been so depressed lately. I also have Major Depression. I'm so tired of feeling too much and hurting to deeply over and over. It's so draining.

  18. hi Lisa, i found you after searching for answers on the internet. You have helped me to understand so much. I am 51 years old and have been in emotional pain for years. I just want to feel better and i thank you for your wisdom, i have also found your meditation so comforting, even though made me cry

  19. Your energy and drive in this video is really inspiring, thank you! It made me realise how deep my attachment trauma goes. Being yanked away from my mother because I couldn't breathe when I was born and being rushed off to the hospital, it must have been days before I was in her arms again. And then 33 years of severe abuse and final discard. Your videos have saved me at the right moment, I was going towards suicide.

  20. thank you i really appreciate the knowledgeinsight. i have alot to accomplish and i will after education on my upbringing etc….i really appreciate your channel!

  21. i really like you..and you are do smart…i just want you to know that..i was imprinted by the MONARCH PROGRAM..AND I AM HAVING TROUBLE FOCUSING..BECAUSE OF THE BUTTERFLIES BEHIND YOU…ITS. SIGAL..FOR ME…HYPNOTIC SUGGESTION…

  22. It really upsets me knowing they need people in order to survived . I got in an agruement with my boyfriend because I told him it's wrong that a friend of ours wife feels like she needs men who are friends to connect with and cuddle or even get to the point where she won't need her husband to lay on to fall asleep, but rather lay on another man to feel safe and these men are close friends that are men .. I may lose my boyfriend over this .

  23. Mrs Romano, I don't think you will see this comment but if you do I really wanted to thank you. I've been traumatized by a borderline mother and a deeply narcissistic step father. Things were so bad in our home that at 17 I was placed in a child protection home for 3 weeks and ended up moving out of my family home to live on my own a short while after. I have been dealing with severe issues and I always feel like everything that I do or say is my fault or wrong. I feel crazy, lost, lonely, guilty, angry and depressed.
    After watching some of your videos I started to be illuminated and realize where the dysfunction was coming from and realizing that I am not the problem was an enormous relief.
    Yesterday I listened to one of your videos while at work and I didn't even flinch. As soon as I got home, I took off my shoes, jacket and purse. I put my glasses on my coffee table and buried my face in my hands, I swear to god, and please excuse my French, I cried like a little bitch. I sobbed uncontrollably and couldn't breath. All the anxiety I've been carrying inside wants out. Thanks to you I've been able to confront these wounds and have decided with my fiancée to seek therapy.
    I'm sorry for the long text but I really have to thank you for your bravery and for your determination to help others. Thank you so very much for helping us who feel helpless. You are a true angel!!
    I bow to the love and light in you!! :*

  24. I have a child and we were separated at her birth because I had pre eclampsia and she had stopped breathing. She is 7. I am having difficulty creating that bond with her. We have gotten much better now. But my questions is, is it too late to help our relationship now, to prevent her to grow up as a codependent? I grew up with a narcissistic mother and I suffered the same detachment with my mother.

  25. This made so much sense! I just had an ah-ha moment. 5% of me always struggled with that cognitive thoughts of "I can't stand this person, why am I even with him?" To that 95% emotional struggle of "I need him, that's love (really just attachment). Thank you for explaining this! Exactly what I needed to hear today. 🙏🏼

  26. My son is having attachment problems. I was fully dialated and my dad walked into the room and my bones closed in on the kid. Wouldn't let him out. Had to be cut out and twisted out from my body. The Doctors had never seen anything like it and 10 guys came in to look at me. Recreated the being passed around to assorted men.
    I didn't get to see much of my son until I was so upset I took him home at 22 hrs old after a C section.

  27. just found your channel too. Ive been listening to ur videos all evening. thank you. Its helping me. From Dublin ☘ xx.

  28. Wow. What Lisa is explaining is a very complex phenomenon that I didn't understand when I was going through it. She explains it so clearly. So, it's the attachment pattern that was programmed to me that I was gravitating towards, not necessarily the person. No wonder I was so confused about the whole relationship! One day I thought this person was it and then next day, I thought not. I get it. So basically, my consciousness was in conflict with my subconsciousness, which was still under the spell of my narcissistic parent.

  29. You just described both major relationships I've had. Both were absuive. One physical and the other verbal and emotional. I never realized why I stayed or why I was even attracted to them. My story is long so I won't put it here but this explains the WHY I do these things and the ah ha I can fix it and ahah there is invisible ink on my forehead because I attract them!! But I see it now so I can change things!! Thank you.

  30. You are brilliant. This is everything I have recently put together through mediation (going in and connecting to spirit) and research. I was just researching the pineal gland before finding you and then all of a sudden found this and then you happened to mention pineal gland and light workers. Everything you say rings so true for me

  31. I want to let you know how much your words mean to me. I am exhausted trying to please my daughter and my partner that I do not take the time to take care of my needs. When you spoke about attachment disorder I had a lightbulb moment! I look forward to learning more. Thank you so much for taking time out of your day to help us.

  32. I am MIND BLOWN! This perfectly describes exactly what I've been going through. You so eloquently describe a fusion of spiritual and psychological aspects to a human condition that has been so difficult to verbalize. Thank you for this video. Thank you for the amazing relief I feel just to realize I am understood. I can't wait to discover the rest of your work. Subscribed. Liked. I am a FAN for LIFE now.

  33. thanks to YouTube and thanks to your light Lisa, didn't hear it the first time but you know, I will hear it the second time, or the third time… namaste…

  34. You're Brilliant!! You're explaining this so well. I knew there was something in this and I'm very pleased I found your video. Thank you for uploading this video!

  35. Thank you so much Lisa for taking the time to these kinds of videos. I feel so inspired by you and for once to feel so understood by someone and encourage to build the life that I want to live. I will continue watching your videos. 💞💞💞

  36. Thank you Lisa for taking the time to make these videos. I found you last year and have watched most of them. I like to listen to you in the mornings when I'm getting ready for work. I truly appreciate what your teachings have done for my life. Bless you!

  37. sometimes i'm so harsh on myself for being codependent. but this video is so empowering it puts me into a more positive mindset. thank you so much for the help lisa

  38. "Micromanaging the needs of the alcoholic while the children in the home are ignored…" …YES. Thanks for helping me put all of this together. Also, about feeling childlike while trying to relate… yeah… these words are really helpful.

  39. OMG now I understand, my mother was pregnant at 38, she though Dr's were crazy telling she was pregnant. Yet with the 4th month she miss carried my twin and I survived. She was alcoholic and drank while.carring me. Amd continue till I was 16 and she sobered up. Mom came.home from work and found the baby sitter gone and me crying in my crib how many times that happened don't know even thu she fired her the.damage was.done. my mother loved me but in the wrong ways. .starting to understand.

  40. Hmmm makes sense, I was born at 6 months and my parents couldn’t take me home after 3 months. And I had to major surgeries when I was a new born. I’m also a twin!

  41. Thank you for dedicating your life to healing others! I love how you explain everything. It is evident youre passionate about this. I look forward to learning more from you! I aspire to be a coach one day as well but Im starting off my journey of healing first! Im so blessed to have found your channel! All the best!

  42. Is it possible to free yourself from unhealthy patterns without rejecting your spouse? Lisa, you bow to the light in your viewers, but what about the light in those who you are counseling them to reject and abandon? You said it right that we are all brothers and sisters and we all need the same things.

  43. This is very helpful. You have a great way of talking about these things. One cannot reason with or come to some understanding, or change a narc partner. One must address ones own attachment trauma from childhood and henceforth. Yay, I've learned something (well, I knew but had forgotten)
    Anyway, it's liberating to focus on your own hurts, that is sometging that's doable. Trying to "fix" a narc partner is futile. Understanding the mechanisms is g o l d 👍 thanks 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟 ❤

  44. All great info. Thank you. But the whole video is you rambling on about another topic ( not the title )and Then never delivering any practical or useful info. It like an ad. Sorry. But im trying to dive into my subconscious and allow my emotions to communicate with me but your video doesnt help.

  45. Becoming enlightened Lisa. Does this also relate to being adopted? Have you any material on adoption & Co Dependency? Am so grateful for sharing your wisdom x

  46. yes a mother bond is almost like a earthly connection……yrs ago i could not figure out why i felt i became invisible when my brother came around and then learned that shortly after i was born i was dropped off at my grammas…so I bonded with my grandmother like i should of to my mom….thank god for my friend that helped me figure this out….i was not able to have kids so i had no clue what this bond even ment…but it leaves you in a lost mode until you understand it

  47. Wow what a gorgeous soul you are. Thanks for your work. I’ve only just found your channel tonight after PRAYING for guidance with my relationships. I’ve just watched about 3 hours worth, crying, releasing + now time to integrate the MANY a-ha moments. Truly a godsend XX

  48. I married an older man when my brothers met him and I didnt see it at all they pointed out he looked talked acted like my father. I married my father

  49. I FEEL BROKEN……….. Two days ago, I contacted "the man that I was married to after not talking to him for (8) years. I took a risk to contact him because I had a dream that there was an infestation of alligators all around me and he saved me, but at the end of the dream, he went back to his wife and his new born baby, like he does in all of my dreams. Only, this was the first time in the dream that there was a baby. I was also told (in real life) that he was not doing well health wise, so I felt the need to reach out to him. When I did, I apologize to him for my part of ruining the relationship and I did not point out any of the hurtful things that he did, which contributed to dissolve our marriage. He responded nicely, he NEVER APOLOGIZED for his part, he said that he was doing great and stated that our experience made him a better man, closing with, he hope's I continue to do well. Although I had no expectation that he would even respond, much less apologize. I cried after I hung up because my inner critic told me that I am not worthy of love because of my childhood trauma, past addictions, cheating, social fears, fear of intimacy, brokenness, and the list goes on. I see a psychiatrist, I work wih a psychologist, and I attend ACoA meetings and work with a sponsor, but I still feel broken about the failure of our marriage, after being separated/divorced from him for (8) years, amongst other things. Since I left him, all I attract are the BEE's but NO Honey. I thought after 8 years that I would have recovered from all of the pain, trauma and loneliness, but I haven't. I feel trapped, like there is no way out of this pain. It has lessened over the years, but I dream about him almost every day (mostly painful nightmares) of which I wake up crying a lot of the times. I want to be okay and in acceptance for the place that I am in life, but I feel so sad and lonely most times. I have been diagnosed with several clinical conditions and I agree with them, but I just can't seem to find my way out of this pain. Please help. 🙁

  50. Does circumcision cause TRAUMA?! Cutting the cord (unless presenting a danger as in your case)? Vaccines? Mass sociological trauma during the infant years. We don't have to like it, but that is what it is.

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